By Jen Walters, LCSW
JFS
2021 has been a year marked by change and adaptation, especially for school-aged children and teens, and this September and October will be no different. Schools are instituting plans for in-person learning and many children, without having that exposure for many months, will be adjusting and adapting again.
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With all of these changes, anxiety for children has increased, as well as the prevalence of other mental health challenges such as depression and suicide in youth. Children, however, are overall resilient, and the signs of their adjustments and stress can be easily overlooked or considered to be signs of medical or behavioral issues.
As we enter another school year, it’s important to become versed in these signs and symptoms, discuss strategies to help children process and review when and how to seek professional help. Signs of anxiety in children can include stomachaches, headaches, heart-pounding, restlessness, worries, resisting and refusing to do things, fears, disruption of sleep or appetite, and lack of focus. Sometimes children appear not to hear adults, as they become engrossed in their thoughts, fears, and worries or they isolate themselves from activities and people they previously enjoyed.
Children need time with trusted adults to process their feelings and benefit most when adults validate how they feel. Once a child hears something like “I can understand why you would feel that way”, then they are more likely to allow us to help them to challenge thoughts that may be out of proportion or irrational. Too often, adults fast forward to challenging the young person’s thoughts or ideas, and children feel unheard or misunderstood. The best times to process are when there is not a lot of other stimulation, or after a distressing time has passed. For example, it is recommended, especially with older children, to take a late evening drive to the ice cream shop or other low-stress errands and discuss feelings or emotions in the car hours after the stressful day, rather than during dinner or other times when stress levels at home can be highest. Some families utilize texting to discuss feelings since face-to-face discussions can lead to increased stress, rather than understanding. I know parents of young children who enjoy drawing their day to begin a discussion about feelings and stress. Carving out even 10 minutes can make a difference in a child’s ability to feel supported, heard, and understood.
Finally, it is important to understand that seeking mental health support is often the best way to prevent a mental health crisis in the future. Therapists are now assisting clients through many means including text, telehealth, in-home, and in-office visits. Signs that your child may need additional support include more than 2 weeks of any of the symptoms mentioned earlier and /or a lack of ability to complete daily activities such a showering or attending to schoolwork. Finally, if your child voices thoughts of hurting themselves or another person, reach out for assistance from local psychiatric screening immediately. Local PESS agencies are trained to help you find the next steps for you and your family. Educate your children about the 741741 crisis text line, which they can contact 24 hours a day and text with a trained crisis counselor.
Serving the community since 1980, JFS is a leading, forward-thinking, highly-respected and non-sectarian social service agency whose doors are open to the whole community, serving clients of all backgrounds (race, religion, ethnicity, culture, socio-economic background, gender, sexual orientation, age, and physical ability). JFS can help you address your problems, explore alternatives, develop new insights, and find solutions through a continuum of services including mental health counseling, geriatric assessments, counseling and case management, Family Mentor Program, career counseling, Ohr Tikvah Jewish Healing Program, services for individuals with disabilities and their families, and services for Holocaust Survivors. If you are interested in learning more about JFS’ programs, please contact us at (908)725-7799, email us at Admin@JewishFamilySvc.org or visit our website: www.JewishFamilySvc.org.