theconnectionsnj.com SENIOR LIVING PAGE 34 It seems that there are more choices we need to make, and they have a greater impact than ever before. While listening to my chosen news programs highlight what I believe to be true, another program may highlight a different view. Every day, I speak with friends whose belief system is contrary to mine, and contrary to what I have chosen to trust as true. And yet, since I respect and admire my friends, I have to strive harder to feel secure in my assessment of situations. Reading what is available, listening to podcasts, and expanding my knowledge all have become tasks I face as overwhelming, yet necessary. My brain doesn’t want to challenge or emotionally depose everyone or everything. My generation had so many fewer choices to make. We had radio when we were children, then black and white television for the financially comfortable, and then color television for the more affluent. We watched entertainment on television. Ed Sullivan entered our living rooms on Sunday nights with comedians, magicians, vocalists, and yes, Elvis Presley, and then, The Beatles! There were sitcoms that had us believe that every family but mine lived the perfect life, and by that, I mean, all problems were solved within 30 minutes. Even the news was a watered-down version of reality. We never saw violence until the Civil Rights Movement or the Vietnam War-at least not to my memory. Riots like Kent State were excerpted to only show students holding STOP THE WAR signs, until the death of four students by the Ohio National Guard during a rally opposing the expanding involvement of the United States in Cambodia. Today, I feel that choosing a cable news station, like so many other subtle choices we make, has become a symbol of our political leanings, and once we declare allegiance to that station, it becomes a betrayal to watch anything else. We are so polarized that we almost have to apologize for our thoughts when in a group that clearly sees the world through a different lens. Moving to a new community last year taught me that I must make the choice to listen, observe body language, and read between the lines before entering a political conversation. Riding in a new couple’s car en route to a restaurant for dinner can give me insight into how they view the same world in which we live. Many meals have teetered on becoming distasteful if certain subjects arise. Choosing to “agree to disagree” has become a mantra, if not a battle cry. Families have deteriorated because of the political divide, and that actually hurts my heart. Members are choosing to believe their way of thinking is more important than another’s way of thinking. How can that be fair? How can we devalue someone close to us for not seeing something the same or even similar? Are we so certain we are right that we would, in fact, rather be right than be loving to each other? I have seen this over and over again over the past several years. It feels as if many will regret their actions when they awaken from their fever dream and have lost relationships that cannot be brought back to life. I am choosing to listen, value, and accept the rights we all have to our beliefs. Here is hoping others will do the same. It feels as if society really needs that to flourish. At least, that is how I choose to see it! SLICE OF LIFE Making Choices By Ellyn Mantell We are so polarized that we almost have to apologize for our thoughts when in a group that clearly sees the world through a different lens.
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