The Connection Bernards-Ridge Edition April/May 2018

PAGE 24 THE BERNARDS-RIDGE CONNECTION APRIL/MAY 2018 It's your home . It's your life . Make it better with Jaeger Kitchens ! Madison 133 Main Street (973) 377-1000 Middlesex 500 Bound Brook Road (732) 968-3555 Stirling 1238 Valley Road (908) 647-1239 Union 2322 Morris Avenue (908) 686-0070 www.JaegerKitchens.com By now, any of my readers know I wholeheartedly believe in Independ- ent and Assisted Living for those able to live in one. Depending upon the needs of the resident, they both offer valuable and life-preserving care. And our family is forever grate- ful that the confidence we have in The Chelsea at Warren continues to keep my mother-in-love (I didn’t cre- ate the term, but I do embrace it!) healthy and dare I say, happy! We did due diligence and made our choice for Mom, and here are some guidelines for your considera- tion when you are ready to do the same: • Look around at the facility, noticing both inside and outside what your loved one will be see- ing on a daily basis. Is the staff pleasant and do they know the residents? Not all places will know everyone by their name, but it is certainly comforting when they do. • Talk with residents and family members, if possible. Are the residents engaged in activities, do they speak with other resi- dents, do they seem content? Does the family feel they have made a positive choice, and were there other places they might have considered? What helped them in their decision? • Food is so important to every- one, so notice the quality of the food, and if possible, have a meal or snack with the resi- dents. Ask about food brought to the room if a resident isn’t feeling well enough to dine with others, and if price is an issue, what does that service cost? • As I mention this to you, I want to cry for those who have to suf- fer if their new home smells of urine, harsh cleaners, or chemi- cals. None of that is acceptable to me, and it won’t be to your parent, either! • Notice if there is an awareness of safety, and even ask that question. Your parent may not wander the first year they are in residence, but it may happen the second, so be prepared. And use your own senses to notice anything that speaks negatively to your gut. You are in charge, and this decision is an incredibly important one, so trust yourself as you make the choice. Best of luck at a time when being in the sandwich generation brings with it a great deal of concern and worry. My mother always told me that “one mother can take care of 5 children, but 5 children have a hard time taking care of one mother.” It is so true, but this is an opportunity for you to “take care” in the most loving of ways. A GUIDE FOR LOOKING INTO ASSISTED LIVING By: Ellyn Mantell www.theconnectionsnj.com