By Dr. Michael Osit
After my parents had 3 boys, they had their fourth child-a girl. They named her Hope- a name that they chose for a girl in the first trimester of the pregnancy. They were “hoping” for a girl- and they got one! Hope is thinking optimistically. It is having positive expectations of an outcome for a person or situation. Hope, however, is not magic and certainly does not guarantee a positive result. Although hope can maintain positivity in a person that can affect a favorable outcome, hope alone is not a solid strategy. Hoping for something is tantamount to “wishing” and having “faith” that something positive will happen.
Although hope is not a feeling, it is closely tied to a lot of emotionality. Hope is a state of mind or a thought process that leads to and is associated with emotions. Interestingly, having enough and consistent hope can eventually translate into having faith. Having hope, wishes, and faith can minimally affect a positive outcome. Unfortunately, however, it is largely comprised of magical thinking and has minimal impact on the actual outcome. The one exception to this might be in the case of chronic or serious medical conditions. A patient’s positive attitude and optimistic outlook can engender the body to fight harder against the disease.
The question arises, since hoping for something is not a truly determining factor in the outcome, should we not even bother to hope for things? Aren’t we just setting ourselves up for disappointment? I hope not! Imagine not hoping for the following:
- I hope my children turn out well, happy, and successful.
- I hope I get a raise or bonus this year.
- I hope my family remains healthy.
Without hope, our outlook would be dismal and negative. Not hoping for good things to occur can lead to depression, or, at the very least, stressful times until the outcome is determined. Hope gives us faith and something to reach for. Hope is positive. Hope gives us something to grab onto, and can even help us to cope better with a potentially negative outcome.
As important as it is for us to maintain hope in our lives and to think positively, but realistically; it is still magical thinking. Hope alone does not create positive endings to potentially negative situations. Active participation and taking control over whatever you can control complements hope. By controlling as much as you can, and doing as much as you can to potentiate a positive outcome, your hopeful wishes are more likely to come to fruition. Having hope plus a plan of action not only creates faith and confidence in getting what you want. It can also turn magical, wishful thinking into attainable goals. Thinking positive, being hopeful, and having a practical plan of action is a formula that not only combats depression, stress, and anxiety; it also helps maintain our motivation to continue to strive for things that give us satisfaction and happiness.
Dr. Michael Osit is a Licensed Psychologist practicing in Warren, and the author of The Train Keeps Leaving Without Me: A Guide to Happiness, Freedom, and Self Fulfillment (2016), and Generation Text: Raising Well Adjusted Kids In An Age Of Instant Everything (2008).