By Dr. Michael Osit
As the 1½ years of Pandemic life gradually ends, we are emerging and resurfacing into a semblance of what life was like Pre-Pandemic. There were varying degrees of how individuals handled this tumultuous time in terms of activities and lifestyle from extremely casual to remaining at home maintaining limited contact with select family members. Now that your daily activities are resuming, it can be an opportunity to not only return to Pre-Pandemic life but to improve upon it, as well, by addressing issues of Control and Trust.
Read more ‘Mind the Mind’ articles via this link: https://theconnectionsnj.com/category/mind-the-mind/
Control
During the lockdown, and even when the world gradually started opening up, we all lost a sense of control over our own lives. Things we took for granted, such as dining inside a restaurant, visiting friends or elderly parents, taking a vacation, going to the movies, or shopping in a store, to name a few, were no longer available to us. The loss of control also took the form of imposed limits set on us such as wearing a mask in public and no social gatherings allowed. Of course, to some degree, since childhood, there have always been controls and limits imposed upon you. But during the Pandemic, imposed controls and limits removed choices and privileges you previously had in your daily life. This caused much anxiety, frustration, and even anger in many people. As I have written about in this column, as well as in my book, “The Train Keeps Leaving Without Me,” having control over your own life is part of the formula for happiness, freedom, and self-fulfillment. During the Pandemic that sense of loss of control affected people negatively while raising awareness of how much was taken for granted when you were able to control your own life.
Enter the Post-Pandemic Era. Consider all of the privileges and life activities lost during the Pandemic and take stock in all that you took for granted including your health, your ability to engage in positive social and family relationships, and making plans for celebrations and excursions. Take control of your life, appreciate, and relish what you used to take for granted, plan events, set goals and a plan to attain them, and enjoy those relationships that were impeded or restricted during the lockdown.
Trust
During the Pandemic, everyone had to put a great deal of trust in others so that we could stay healthy and Covid free. We had to trust that others were being careful, and not conducting their lives to place them at risk to transmit the virus to you. To some degree, we always had to trust that others were not reckless in their actions (driving or otherwise) to keep us safe and healthy. However, during the Pandemic the awareness of having to trust others was heightened significantly.
Enter the Post-Pandemic Era. An awareness of others is still within our minds; however, it isn’t as prevalent or strong of a need. But, wondering whether or not the person sitting across from you on the train, or at the next table in a restaurant has Covid or is conducting their life in a way that they are high risk for Covid can still cross your mind. Understanding that to some degree we are relying on others being vaccinated or at least “doing the right thing” to maintain their own health and in turn protecting ourselves, we need to reverse our self-directed concerns to make sure we are acting trustworthy toward others. Knowing that whomever you come in contact with has some level of concern about your potential for spreading the virus, you must conduct yourself in a respectful manner by maintaining social distance and wearing a mask even if it is to help them feel comfortable and put their mind at ease. This is not a political suggestion, nor is it even a scientifically data-based request. It is a recommendation so that you are a considerate and respectful person regardless of your political views or scientific thoughts. Raising your awareness of others can go to another level, making you that much better of a person.
Dr. Michael Osit is a Licensed Psychologist practicing in Warren, and author of The Train Keeps Leaving Without Me: A Guide to Happiness, Freedom, and Self Fulfillment (2016), and Generation Text: Raising Well Adjusted Kids In An Age Of Instant Everything (2008).