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Conquer Procrastination
Overcome Distractions
Reduce Stress
Increase Productivity
Control Clutter
Manage Time
Patricia Diesel
PO, CEC, Author/Columnist
Keep It Simple Now, LLC
908-642-1226
www.keepitsimplenow.com
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BREAKING THE CYCLE OF
CHRONIC LATENESS
By: Patricia Diesel, CPC
There are books, articles and studies per-
formed to try and help people overcome
their chronic lateness. Some experts believe
in order to break the pattern we need to
look at not only what we are doing but
why
we are doing it. I concur.
Let’s look at some examples of how people
show up chronically late in areas of their life;
appointments, interviews, ceremonies…
Take the classic physician who is always run-
ning late with patients. Now in their
defense, they will most likely explain their
circumstances with reasons such as being
over-booked, an emergency arose, or a pop-
ulated epidemic of something. Now from
the patient’s perspective, who is in the wait-
ing room 45 minutes or much longer, he is
probably feeling anxious and a tad put-off,
as it can be perceived as a lack of respect of
time.
In Anna’s case, there was no question that
being on time was essential for her upcom-
ing interview. It was a company that she
would be thrilled to work for. There was one
problem. With all the excitement, Anna for-
got to verify the location. By the time she
was off and running, she realized she didn’t
know exactly where she was going. Hence,
she showed up 30 minutes late for the inter-
view. Not only was she stressed out and
embarrassed, but she carried that energy all
throughout the interview process. You can
guess the outcome - Anna didn’t get the
job.
When Brian’s childhood friend asked him to
be the best man for his wedding, he admit-
ted it was one of the highlights of his life.
Not only was it a huge honor, but it was a
big responsibility. He wanted to make sure
everything went smooth and that his long
time buddy could count on him during this
happy occasion. The morning of the wed-
ding, Brian walked out the door and neg-
lected to bring the wedding bands that his
friend entrusted him with. Just about
halfway through his driving time to the cere-
mony, he realized he had to turn back home
to go get them. Needless to say, Brian was
15 minutes late. Brian was so worried that
he ruined the most important day of his
friends life. He apologized all day long.
A good starting point to breaking the cycle
of lateness is to become consciously aware
of your lateness and then to make the effort
to prioritize being prompt. You can begin
with observing the cost of being late and
the payoff of being on time.
Cost of being late –
being late is upsetting
to others and stressful for the one who is
late.
Payoff of being on time –
eliminates stress
and the need to apologize.
The consequence of being late all the time
runs deeper than this however. When you
are chronically late you are not showing up
as the best version of yourself. You are cre-
ating a reputation for yourself that is send-
ing messages that people can’t trust or rely
on you. This impacts your relationships and
your self-esteem.
Considering the technical aspect of why
people are late is also important. Not having
good planning skills or how to estimate how
long things will take can be critical. A simple
exercise you can try is to write down how
long you think each thing you do will take
and then compare it to how long it actually
took to complete. The comparison will help
you find your pattern so you can adjust your
time.
Learning how to say NO by either declining
or deferring when people are asking things
of you will also help you stay mindful with
your commitment to time. You can use
catch phrases, such as;
“I would love to help but I have a prior com-
mitment.”
I am on a tight deadline, so I have to pass on
this.”
“I have plans during that time today, but
maybe tomorrow I can.”
From an emotional/psychological aspect we
can look at this from a different view. Most
people know what they are doing by arriv-
ing late. They are choosing to arrive when
they want. The question is “Why?” Here are
some possibilities:
Resistance – Carried over from a rebellious-
ness childhood.
Crisis Maker – Thrives on mini crisis of run-
ning late.
Adrenaline – Need the rush of being under
the gun to get things moving .
Anxiety – Fear about where they are going.
There are many tools that can be used to
help decipher the why of what makes one
late, but from a life coaching perspective, I
can tell you that understanding where the
emotional blocks come from is key to under-
standing why we do what we do and how
to break the cycle.
In my new book –
Life Coaching – a Guide
to Hiring a Life Coach
– I talk about how
instrumental coaching has been in my life as
well as how to go about finding a coach
that can help you. Through coaching you
can find ways to overcome
your lateness and begin to
learn how to convert time into
a pleasurable experience.
For a limited time you can
receive a copy of Patricia’s
new book with a special
coaching offer. Contact her
now @ 908-642-1226 or
email keepitsimplenow@gmail.com.
O
RGANIZE
THAT
PAGE 60
Health and Wellness